Same Old Lang Syne
by yurisnow
Summary: All I wanted was a beer. One beer to help me relax for the night. I didn't bargain for meeting her again, and I certainly wasn't prepared for the news I received.


**Author's Note: **I have a one-shot idea I got from _Same Old Lang Syne _by Dan Fogelberg. Next to _Last Kiss _by Pearl Jam, it's the saddest song on my iPod.

I'm trying something knew out with this. I'm trying to get a longer word count and do some different things. I believe I achieved the longer word count. This is my longest one-shot by far.

Anywho, I hope you enjoy :]

XxXxXx

I was in the grocery store buying some food and beer for Sammy and I while we were stuck in Salt Lake because of snow. Imagine that, snow in Salt Lake. We had been working a case and we finished the salt and burn. Now we decided to stay in the night because it was Christmas Eve and the snow. It was more Sam's idea then mine. I didn't want to but Sam insisted that we stay in Salt Lake to have Christmas here. I agreed because I knew it would make Sam happy.

Walking through the grocery store, I grabbed some random food. Fritos, Cheetos, peanut M&M's, Swedish Fish, and some Veggie Straws for Sam. He loved those things. I'm not sure why they were alright but I don't like eating junk food that tastes like vegetables. Walking down the beer aisle, I look at all our options and estimated there were at least fifty different choices. However, only about fifteen of them stood out. Heineken. Budweiser. (Which that stuff is gross). Bud Light. Coors. 312. Goose Island. Miller. Miller Light. St. Paulie Girl. High Life. Guinness.

I stood there with my arms crossed trying to figure out what I wanted to buy. The decisions were so hard. I knew I wasn't going to buy Budweiser, Bud Light, or Miller Light. Those were already off the list. I needed help with this. Sometimes buying beer was harder than an actual job. I pulled out my phone and dialed a number that I could dial in my sleep.

"What?"

"I need your help Sammy." I admitted overwhelmed with the choice of beer in front of me.

"With what?" I heard the TV volume go down which meant he was watching the Skin or a porn channel.

"Picking out beer." I smirked knowing my brother was doing something he didn't want to me to find out about.

"You are never good at this."

"I know, that's why I need your help. I would rather kill a hundred demons before I tackled choosing one good beer."

"I know and I would rather pick out a beer then kill demons." I heard a sigh on the other end of the line. "What are your opitions?"

"There's like fifty of them."

"Just tell me the beers you're thinking about."

"The list is like a rooster for a movie."

"Just tell me the beers Dean," Sam sighed getting frustrated.

"Alright, alright don't get you panties in a knot. We have Heineken, Budweiser, Bud Light, Coors, 312, Goose Island, Miller, Miller Light, St. Pauile Girl, High Life, and Guinness." I read over the beers. "We have an army of 'em and I dunno which one to pick."

"312," Came as the immediate response.

"Do you even like 312?" I grabbed the beer and shifted so my shoulder was holding the phone to my ear.

"Yeah," I heard something fall in the background.

"What are you doing?"

"I'll talk to you when you back to the motel," Sam hung up the phone before I could say anything else.

I moved the beer so it was in my other arm so I could slid my phone back into my pocket. Once the phone was safely in my pocket, I held the beer with my other hand. I had the basket it in one hand and the beer in the other. I began to walk down the aisle and to the check out when I spotted a black haired girl.

My breathing hitched when I realized who it was. I recognized the way she walked and the way she flipped her hair. I stayed still for a moment before I decided to follow her down the frozen aisle.

I watched her as she walked. The way she walked mesmerized me. I wanted to drop everything and hug her from behind like what we use to do. I use to sneak up behind her and tackle her from behind surprising her. Then she would turn around kissing me on the lips. I smiled at the memory of that and wanted to go behind her and tackled her.

Walking about twenty paces behind her, she turned her head; I pretended to open the door of the refrigerator looking for something. I watched her from the corner of my eye. She spotted me but it didn't register who I was.

Once she was gone from the aisle, I closed the door and rested my head against it. I sighed wishing I would have done something. "I'm a stupid ass," I muttered walking down the aisle trying to figure out which way she would have gone. "Sonvabitch it could have been my only time to see her again and I let it slip by," I walked down the main aisle and glanced to my right to see her standing in front of an open refrigerator door.

I felt my heart race as I approached her. It felt weird because this never happened when I approached a girl. I usually thought up cheesy pick up lines that got a girl no matter even when I used my charming smile. Not with her, I would use a different approach. I would use my old approach before everything changed. I took a deep breath and walked up to her.

Her back was facing mean and I went to tap her shoulder but instead I pulled on her sleeve. I wasn't sure what I was thinking. No one pulled on someone else's sleeve when they wanted to get the attention of someone. They usually just tapped the shoulder or called out there name.

She paused and slowly turned around. I was met with her bright, sparkling brown eyes. I smiled and held my breath waiting to see if she remembered me. She was studying my face like it was a map of the world trying to soak everything in and figure out what she was looking for. I was about to say something when she smiled. I released the breath I had been holding. "Dean."

"Hey Cassie," I smiled happy she remembered me. I put my groceries on the floor and held my arms out for Cassie. She was only holding her purse and she went to hug me. I held her in my arms and breathed in the scent I would never forget. The scent that had stuck with me all these years. We had dated while she was in college and years later Sammy and I had saved her and her mother from the demon monster truck. As I breathed in her scent, all those memories came flooding back.

The hug ended and while Cassie was pulling away from me, her purse got caught on my arm and everything in the purse spilled out. We looked at each other awkwardly at first but then we began to laugh. We laughed until tears rolled down our faces because we were both thinking of the same memory.

After the laughter ended, I bent down to pick everything in Cassie's purse up. I handed everything to her. "Thanks."

"No problem," I bent down to pick up my groceries. "I can help you with your cart," I nodded to the cart that was standing behind her.

"It's alright, I got it," Cassie turned starting to push the cart.

"I got it," I insisted putting my items into the cart. "It's fine, really."

"Alright," Cassie said, maneuvering her purse so it sat more comfortably on her shoulder.

We walked in silence to the checkout line. Neither of us saying anything because we didn't know what to say. Even though we had dated for a couple years, then seen each other a year and a half ago, it was still awkward. We walked with the atmosphere in the middle of awkwardness and embarrassment. I pushed the cart to the shortest line and started to unload everything I was buying and then put everything Cassie was going to buy on the conveyer belt. She nodded in thanks and I paid for everything I bought. I waited at the end of the line for Cassie to finish.

"I guess this is good bye?" Cassie looked around avoiding my eye contact.

"Do you want to get a drink somewhere?" I asked before I knew the words left my mouth.

"Nothing is going to be open, it's Christmas Eve."

"It's fine, I just bought some beer," I lifted the twenty-four pack of beer up to show Cassie that I really did have beer and I wasn't making it up.

"It's Christmas Eve, I should get back home," Cassie said.

"It's alright, only one drink. Please Cassie? I haven't seen you in a year. I want to catch up," I tried to convince her to let us have a drink and talk about the past.

"Alright," Cassie gave in.

I smiled at her and we walked to her car talking a little. Mainly the how-have-you-been's and what-are-you-up-too's. We answered them honestly. Cassie was the first person I had a relationship with and who I had told about hunting. It hadn't gone over very well and she ended up breaking up with me. It had crushed me because I loved her. I didn't have Sam around then to lean on – metaphorically speaking – and help be through that time. He had been off at Stanford earning his Law degree.

We stopped beside her car. "Hold on, lemme drop my things off in my car. I'll be right back." I walked over to the Impala and set all my groceries in the passenger seat. I grabbed four beers and brought them back over to Cassie who was now sitting in her car with the engine running to warm the car up.

I knocked on the window of the passenger side and Cassie unlocked the car. I opened the door and slid into her 2005 Ford Focus. I handed her a beer, set one between my legs, and put the other two in the cup holders. We both opened ours at the same time and I looked over at Cassie. "To innocence?"

"To innocence," Cassie held her beer up and I tapped mine against hers. We both swallowed some and settled in the awkward silence.

"Cassie, how did you end up here?" I asked after a couple of minutes in the silence.

Cassie played with her beer for a little while before answering me. I could tell she was thinking of the best way to explain it. "After you left, I met someone who was visiting his family. He lived in Athens, Ohio."

"Where you went to college."

"Yes, where I went to college," Cassie nodded. "But anyway, his family lived back in Missouri, I had met him once or twice through a friend while I was going out with you. I didn't know him then. But while he was here, I got to know him. We went out on a date and then that date lead to more dates. After at least three, we were going out. About six months into the relationship I knew he was the one."

I took another drink of my beer shifting uncomfortably waiting for Cassie to continue.

"He proposed to me three weeks later. I accepted of course because I loved him. He was working for a company in architect in Ohio but there headquarters is here. They wanted him to move to Salt Lake so he could be closer to work. He agreed and I decided to move with him since we were getting married soon. We married three months after moving to Salt Lake. We've been married for four months now." I could tell Cassie was happy that she was married and living with a man she loved as she showed me her ring. I gave her a silent congratulations.

"Enough about me, why are you here?" I could tell Cassie was uncomfortable talking about her and her husband around me because we had gone so deep into the relationship we had had.

"I'm here working a case with my brother." I said not going into detail because I know she didn't want to know about the details.

Cassie nodded and held up her beer for another toast as she brushed away what I had said. "To now?"

"To now," I nodded and lightly tapped my beer against hers.

After that, we slipped into light conversations. We talked about our plans for the future, what we had bought our family for Christmas, and the past. We talked a lot more about the past because that was less painful then the future. In the middle of our conversation, my phone rang and I ignored it. I didn't want to be bothered right now because I knew this moment would never come again. After today, I knew I would never see Cassie again.

After we had talked about every memory we had while we were dating and then the short time we had seen each other a year and a half ago, we slipped into silence. Neither of us knowing what to say. I wanted to stay here and continue to talk but it was getting late. It was Christmas Eve and Cassie needed to get back to her husband who was at home waiting for her. I needed to get back to Sam who was back at the motel waiting for me.

Cassie must have been reading my thoughts because the next thing I knew, she was talking. "I should get back home."

"Yeah, you have your husband and I have my brother I need to get back to," I drank the rest of the beer and crushed the can in my hand frustrated that this was going to end so soon.

I turned my head to face Cassie and I felt her lips upon mine. I closed my eyes and she pulled away before anything else could happen. "Good night Dean."

I opened the car door and got out of the car. "Good night Cassie, take care." I closed the door and watched her pull out and drive away. I felt the pain creep into my chest knowing that I was watching the one girl I loved drive away. As her car speed off into the distance, I walked back to the Impala and sat down the driver's seat. I turned the car on and pulled out of the parking spot. I drove back to Sam who was waiting for me in the motel.

XxXxXx

"Where were y—Are you alright?" Sam asked as I closed the door behind me. I leaned against the door and looked around the room. It was decorated for Christmas with a little plastic Christmas tree in the corner of the room with a couple presents underneath it.

"I saw Cassie," I walked into the room and set the groceries on the table. I walked back over to my bed and laid down on it.

"What happened?" Sam moved so he was facing me.

"We talked and drank. She's married Sammy. She lives here with her husband." I muttered feeling the ache in my chest. I felt tears begin to pool in my eyes. I shook my head not wanting to cry.

"It's alright Dean," Sam tried to comfort me but it wasn't helping.

"I still love her Sammy," I whispered softly. I didn't hear a response from Sam and looked out the window seeing the snow turn into rain.


End file.
